To Love At All

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will certainly be wrung, and possibly be broken."

-C.S. Lewis

To love at all...to love, to love.

To love is one's highest calling, one's noblest ambition.

Love, and you will be wrung.

Be wrung, and you will certainly be broken.

Be broken, and you will certainly be humbled.

Be humbled, and you will certainly begin to be wise.

Become wise, and you will certainly begin to understand.

Begin to understand, and you will certainly begin to fall in love.

Fall in love, and you will certainly be wrung.

To love at all is one's highest calling, one's noblest ambition.

To love at all...to love, to love.

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will certainly be wrung, and possibly be broken."

C.S. Lewis

The Loveliness of You

In a note to my sister, I said:
I think of you all the time; especially now. I think about the word "Autumn" so often, as it is vibrantly before me, out of every window, on every street corner, around every bend in the sidewalk. The colors are beautiful in Haviland. I wish you could be here to see it, you'd really love it. It's so brisk and cozy; quite pastoral with leaves of brilliant color--altogether very much Autumn time.

At the present moment, I am lying under my bed, in a cocoon-like nook, very much at my leisure. It's quite lovely, being under here. This evening has been my quasi-spiritual spiritual retreat. I was being the prepared Navigator and getting directions for a bulk of my three hours under the bed, but the most of my time was, of course, reverted back to facebook. Oh, facebook. It has quickly become the drudgery of us all. So, I shall have a real spiritual retreat later on in the week. This has simply been a nice preface.
Yet, I have been encouraged by conversations with friends that I have had tonight, which is wonderful.

A few night ago, I was in quite the despondently whimsical mood, so I decided to read World Literature in the Bear's Den. I had a thought while reading--as usual, fully separate from anything Ovid could produce. I did not have any paper with me, only a pencil. So, I had nothing else but the inside cover of the thick text book. I thought on paper for about fifteen minutes, and then kept on reading. Then, someone came up from behind and began a conversation. Oh, the irony of timing sometimes. It never ceases to amuse me how perfectly timed some things can be.
I'll post what I wrote soon. It's quite interesting, I think.

I am missing home so very much lately; everything about it. Namely, the relationships, but my goodness, so often it is the quietness of our hill, or the dark, star-filled skies, the sun that causes the ocean to glimmer as it sets, or the enchantment of a walk in the avocado grove.

The more I am away, the more I fall in love with my home.
"Absence makes the heart grow fonder"

Kansas is nice, it really is. I'm beginning ot love it very much. But, it's not home.
"Home is where the heart is"
Frankly, I'm not Dorothy, and don't ever wish to be.

That is, unless I can fly over the rainbow away from the world.

"Say, we're moving forward, faster than we really know."
It feels as if my body and mind have been moving so quickly lately, that my heart cannot keep up.

Five Weeks. Five weeks. That's all I have to do. Five. If the next five are as quick as the last five, I should be able to make it. Then again, the last five have been trecherously hard for the soul.
Which, I believe, poses quite the problem.

Although the colors have been wonderfully brilliant lately,
"...when you're gone, the colors seem to fade"

"I want to walk with you, on a cloudy day, in fields where the yellow grass grows, knee-high: so won't you try to come, come away with me...and I'll never stop, stop loving you?"

"If I was a painter, I'd paint my reverie, if that's the only way for you to be with me...and I'm dreaming of a place where I could see your face, and I think my brush could take me there"

Trivialities

A brief overview of my thoughts and ponderings at the present moment:

Greek went too quickly--in one ear, and through the brain too quickly to absorb much of it.
Yet, we talked about verbs, tenses, and a verb chart much like the one I used in Spanish; that will be a great help. I did the worst I ahve done yet on the quiz, thus proving the fact that I must work longer and harder on Greek, and get into a study group-rather, form one-in order to excell at a quicker rate.
My thumb hurts. No, my hand pains me greatly.
I sprained my right thumb playing volleyball last week, on Wednesday; yes, it was worth it-ooh, fully-but it hurteth this week. That makes writing quickly hard. Writing at all, really, but especially quickly, presently for Greek and Bible Study Methods.
I'm in the library. My surroundings are the best they have ever been in the library lab....yeah.
(Refer to previous post)

I had the craziest small-world story occurance today;

Stacey Wheeler, my piano teacher, is marreid to Tony Wheeler.
Tony is good friends with John Trent, who was here last week. He wrote the Blessing, which dad and mom love.
John Trent is good friends with Chuck Swindoll.
Chuck's grandson is Ryan Swindoll.
Ryan's girlfriend (whow) is Autumn Hinrichs.
Autumn is my sister.
Stacey mentioned today that through those interesting turn of events, they figured out that Ryan's new girlfriend is Chuck's grandson, is John's friend, is Tony Wheeler, whose family works at Barclay.
Yeah...that would only happen to a Belden.
Catch the craziness?
Ultimately, Autumn and Ryan were "destined" for each other. Yes--cheese is allowed when it comes to this type of explanation.
Along with "fall" relationships, shooting stars in Whittier skies, and Barclay-related connections, they're simply 'sposed to be together!

I called Autumn today and told her about it. Quite an amusing story.

Now is small groups. I'm ready, not, and perfectly alright with it.

Nonetheless, God is good-and He is sovereign.

A.D.H.

-Not, is: the Slightest-

Teach me, Oh God.

"Help me to learn;

make me grow.

Show me what

you want of,

from me

through this.

I have no idea;

please help me to

grasp and understand

what it is you have for me

to learn through this year."

JFA

This is what I get to be apart of!

I am beginning to start a pro-life ambassadors club here on campus; the interest level is high, the activity level is low. Through JFA and Defending Human Value, Barclay can become a student body that is actively pro life.

Hopefully more people from Barclay are able to join me in this venture in October.

Please be praying for us!

The mission of Justice For All is
to train thousands to make abortion unthinkable for millions, one person at a time.

JFA Training Exhibit Will Help You:

Learn how to answer different questions ("What about rape?")

Grow in courage; help hurting people; gain motivation for further study.

Learn how to help people change their minds by listening and asking questions.

Learn how to have life-saving conversations through the JFA Exhibit Outreach.

"It will take an eternity for the unborn to defend themselves."

"Make the injustice visible." -- Mahatma Gandhi

http://jfaweb.org/ : check it out.

"My Life: Thus Far"

Adria Hinrichs

Spiritual Formation

Dave Williams

August 20, 2009

An Efflorescent Expression

As I see it, I really do not. I know where I have been, but I have no idea where I am headed. The one thing I know is that Jesus Christ is Lord, as sole author and perfecter of my faith; thus, I will live in Him, and enjoy his goodness as long as I have breath in my lungs. Through this expression of my life thus far, I will strive to present a little background from whence I came, so that Christ, through me, may go out and be witness to his great and boundless love.

To begin, I accepted Christ at a young age; I have grown up in a Christian home: two parents happily married, an older sister, and two little brothers. I am exceptionally grateful for the positive impact my family has had on my life. Not just immediate family, but my entire extended family; the love and encouragement they have poured into my life are immeasurable. I am so blessed to have such a godly, gracious family to model for me a life well lived.

As I entered junior high, my faith really became “my own”. Through a more mature look at Christ and his love for me, and the help of my home church’s youth group, I was able to begin to grasp the extent of God’s love for me. Throughout high school, the Lord grew me and strengthened me in countless ways. Through my youth group, as well as my own study and experiences, God became more real to me. He is a faithful friend, who has my best in mind, a beautiful Lord, who creates things for my pleasure and enjoyment and the one Truth that stands, when all else give way to the constraints of the world. He is also sovereign. When trial and sadness come, He is right there in the middle of it. The last semester of my senior year was the single most influential few months in my life thus far. Through some friends’ sudden deaths via a car accident, I began to understand his sovereignty. Through a terrible car accident I was in shortly after my friends’, I saw his complete goodness and immeasurability in choosing to save my life, while he chose to take my friends’ lives.

The summer after my senior year, I moved all the way from Southern California to Haviland, Kansas, to begin my ascent into higher education. This was quite an influential time in my life as well, in a completely different way than the semester prior. I grew to enjoy the culture here, and accept the fact that not all things are like California--no mountains or sea in the prairie. The Lord grew me and drew me to himself in a way which I had not discovered last year.

Next, came China. This experience was so incredible, so fully shaping and forming for me. This summer, I went on a missions trip to China, to work with orphans for two weeks. The ultimate opportunity for a girl who adores children, and loves to love the unloveable. Each “volunteer” (me) at this summer camp for orphans has a “buddy” (an orphan). Although I have a heart for needy children, God slammed me with a child so needy and unloveable, that I could not love her on my own; through Christ’s love and grace, I grew to love my little girl. She is a precious Child of God, too. Just like the rest of the “buddies” I had--who were precious, sweet and so very lovable, my little girl, DouDou, needed love, too. So, I showed her God’s love in and through my words and actions that week.

I am now at Barclay for one more year, will graduate with my AA, and transfer to Chico State in California, to study child development and journalism. I hope to return to China to work with orphans and be a journalist for a children and families magazine. I am grateful for the experiences the Lord has given me. My life is so full, so rich; for this, I will praise him.

Road Trip!!

We're in Odessa, Texas right now, and it's 1:15 in the morning.
"...Like the dress that girl in Odessa wore..."
(that's Last 5 Years)
We've had such a fun trip thus far.
Oh, and Natalie, my dearest cousin, Autumn, my wonderful sister, and I, the Barclay-bound, are all on our way, via our 'muted plum' 2007 Ford Focus, to Haviland, Kansas, to drop me off at school.
We started out ont he 15, then onto the 40, and stayed on that through the rest of the most lovely state, California, into Arizona, through New Mexico, and now just tonight as the sun was setting, did we enter the great state of Texas.
SUCH sadness that erupts from my being when I think about next Monday night, when they will be heading off into the sunset...without me. No! It is simply too much to bear.

Tomorrow we're headed to Dallas, which is about 5 hours away. We're spending most the day with Ryan Swindoll, going to dinner with him, then onto Pat Kelly's for the night. Emily Evans will join us for breakfast.
This is the most exciting, anticipated, day of the trip.
I'll tell you why AFTER the fact! ;-)

I just checked my facebook (yay for free wireless at our hotel), and saw some really fun pictures of Carm's, who was my roomie for week one and two, and went onto X'ian for the next two weeks of camp. Such fun of the moped ride, Becca's barndance, swing dancing, and fun ones of she and her buddies. They are so precious! So many memories.
I was laughing one minute, then almost in tears the next, just remembering all the experiences that were had.

Now, it's time for beddy-bed-bed.
A twin, and a Queen, and three girls. Who gets it?! ;)

Oh, and another fun quirk of our trip:

Major premise:
Natalie, the tallest, must have the seat far back to drive. Thus, I, a tad shorter than Autumn, must sit in the backseat, directly behind her, for I have the shortest legs, and am the least prone to clostrophobia. (In fact, it is nonexistent for me.)
Minor Premise:
Adria, the shortest, must have the seat quite close in order to reach the pedals and see over the steering wheel. That said, Natalie can sit behind Adria and have ample amounts of leg room!
Conclusion:
Therefore, because Natalie is tall, and Adria is short, our height-differences work out quite well.

Au revoir!

Back.

I'm home from China! It's really an indescribable experience,
except for a novel's worth...so that'll come later.
I say it's--present tense--becasue it's an ongoing process of thoughts and emotions.
As for now, I've got a Math final TONIGHT to study for...so I'm going to do that instead. Bazerk, I know.
Of course, while studying, I'm sipping Chinese tea (that Autumn thinks tastes like Bacon, and I think smells so much like China it hurts) and listening to Michael Buble, which is the next best thing to Big Bad Voodoo Daddy or the like, which I'm in the mood for, as China's always on my mind...
I'm basically leading a double-life this week.
The Schoenwald's are here, which is so much fun--Disneyland, Beach, Hinrichs Compound, Swimming Hole, Horseback Riding, Sea World, hiking to the Hollywood sign, walks on the Plateau...so much fun.
and then there's all the thought about China: memories flood their way into my thoughts quite often, prayers for so many, contemplations on next summer, jetlag, joys, sorrows, hard things, wonderful things, hard, wonderful things, a twice-broken broken toe from swing dancing
(or lifts, flips, and drops....yes, drops. Thanks, Greg ;), thoughts of the kiddos now in their orphanages...so many memories.

Expectancy

It's 2 days until I leave for China!

I can hardly contain my excitement :). I leave Friday morning at about 1:40 AM, but we'll leave for LAX Thursday night. I've been preparing for it, bit by bit, all week. I've been to Target twice, and Walmart last week for clothes, gifts, and craft/activity supplies for the orphans. I've bought little foam visors for the kiddos to decorate and keep, and cute "stained plastic windows' for them to paint, as well. I got a monkey and two palm trees--because I love palms--aka, the beach, and that's a fun thing for them to remember me by. No doubt we'll talk about things we like--and, that will come to mind, because I've been there 3 times in the last week--technically, the last 6 days.
I'm off to sleep. Goodnight, world, and sweet dreams!

China

China is just around the corner!

I can't believe how close I am to going on this venture. I just flipped through the camp magazine again, and read a couple stories from the Love Delivery book, which is full of orphans' stories. I had one more of the many "exuberance" moments in excitement of the trip. Every time I think about leaving--actually getting on that plane and heading to a foreign land, where the children await their week at camp, excites me to the point that I can hardly handle it. I seriously do not think that there is a more perfect thing for me to do...there is almost nothing I love doing more than being with children in need--loving on them, giving them hugs and kisses galore, playing with them--giving them the chance to express themselves in the most delightful way.

Oh! What joy! My excitement is uncontainable.

I'll be at camp with Bring Me Hope from July 10-25.

That's 15 days, friends. 15 days!! 2 weeks and a day. It's already been a week since the fling, which really seems like yesterday's event, and that's half the time I have in between now and that plane flight, when I'll be 'leavin' on a jetplane...'

...at 1 on Saturday morning! Whew.

Mrs. Nauretz just filled out my reference form for China--I finally printed it out and actually had somebody do it.

I was so very blessed by what she said on it.

Yeah, that'd I be an ASSETT to this missions trip. And I am "...filled with a heart of compassion toward all walks of people. She is a giver of her time and talents." I can almost hear her saying "You're a super servant--let's give God a clap offering for this opportunity!" ;-)

Now, I'm going to write an encouragement letter to David--David Bolt, the camp director. Gosh, I'm amazed at what a person can do when God equips them to do it.

Hey, there won't be a single adult on staff at our camp location!

Hmm, we'll see what that'll look like. ;]

Oh, and by the way, I'll be in Zheng Zhou. I fly into Beijing, and then catch a connecting flight to the CGO airport...where a camp staffer will pick me up. Please pray that I will have no complications flying in. If I have the least incling of a temperature, they will quarantine me for the first week of my trip! That would be dreadful. Ugh, yuck. NO thank you! Thank you for your prayers, friends.

also, I finally finished all of my thank-you notes last night. Yikes, I LOVE thanking people, making sure they know that I got their check, and appreciate it with all of my heart, but boy oh boy, actually sitting down with a stack of checks to write thank you notes from was yucky. But once I started to actually write the notes, I was most blessed. Such it is with most of life. :(

Thank you, so incredibly much, for all who supported me on this venture.

I am humbled and blessed in abundance by your prayer and fiscal support.

I will, most assuredly, be posting quite a couple posts after I go to China, and hopefully before, about my thoughts, particular excitements, coming fears, etc.

Until later, then!

Hope and Joy

Beginnings

I finally started a blog!

After about a year of pondering the idea, I made one.

I think blogging will prove itself a very useful and enjoyable practice. I seem to have little pieces of paper floating around my dormroom, Bible, and room at home with some little thought on it--essentially, a "Pensee". I've tried compiling them into my journal, but about half way through one stack, I decide against it and end up with more pensees the next month. Tis a hopeless business! And I'm positive that one day, I will not become a Pascal, and have my 'works' published posthumously...

In any case, I'm quite excited to join the blogging world.

Thanks for your time and interest!

Check back soon, because soon my little pensee pieces will become blog posts.

With joy and hope,

Adria Dawn